Love-handles for Lent and other musings

Totally got a kick out of this Lent word-cloud

I found at theblueroomblog.org

Yesterday I tweeted that I was giving up my love handles for Lent. Obviously it was a joke... but the more I thought about it, the more I figured I was kind of serious. Much like with Holden, with Zoë I lost a bunch of weight fast apres delivery... then I hit a plateau. And that plateau happened to be about 8 lbs more than I weighed before I got pregnant (the difference with Zoë is that I started about 10 lbs lighter than I did with Holden). If I were a superhero, I would've been called "Super-Chubs."

Anyway, my point is, I've got some lovely love-handles... top grade. Just squishy enough for excellent muffin-topping; yet giggle-tastic so it's hours of fun for the whole family. Act now, and you can receive my front-bum at no extra charge!

I don't want to be obsessive about losing weight. I know I have plenty of milk for Zoe; so I really dont think that's going to be a problem if I ease up a bit on my caloric intake... (for some reason, there is a direct correlation to milk-prduction and my int-ake of cupcakes and cinnamon rolls. it was the same with Holden... it's like I start lactating and my internal GPS starts playing the role of Siri "I have found 12 dozen cupcakes within a 5 mile radius." Only in my case, it's a 2 foot radius because I keep baking the friggin' things.

I need an overhaul.

I'm not a horrible eater. I bake most of the "junk-food" I consume...and ironically, it's made with organic cane sugar. Ha! But I recognize that doesn't make it healthy.

I read this Louise L. Hay article about heel spurs (mine has reappeared and is ever so annoying). She advocated taking in more protein and green veggies. (Makes sense. I've been waking up lately craving green smoothies, but then end up eating... yes, cinnamon rolls, instead.)

Ms. Hay says that "metaphysically, feet symbolize direction as well as our understanding of ourselves. The heels are 'shock absorbers' for the family, both within and without. The spurs can be a deep-seated fear of the unknown and a sense of total vulnerability."

And then asks "Do you feel out of step with everyone around you?"

I wouldn't say I feel out of step with everyone around me; but I am having a bit of a time trying to figure out what/where I should be stepping. I have questions about how I'm raising Holden... the right choice for pre-school and schooling in general. I wonder if Zoë is getting the full attention she needs, and I know that Danny is constantly at the short end of that stick.

I miss working out, going for a run, and my yoga practice is definitely suffering.

Perhaps I am living the oxygen-mask analogy...neglecting myself, and thus everyone else around me suffers. The irony is that I'm not playing the martyr. I am not putting everyone else ahead of me out of selflessness. I'm just making poor eating choices and struggling with time-management.

That said, I am turning over a new leaf for Lent.

I think I'll give up desserts and processed sugar. That is one of the healthiest things I can do for myself... there by choosing into my best self, and thus being better for all those around me.

On a separate but similar note, I'm sure my husband just wishes I'd spend more time...well, I don;t really need to say it do I? I mean, my father-in-law reads this, you know.