TFO – Is that txt-speak for TOTALLY FREAKING OUT?

If not, it should be. For those of you NOT ridden with angst, I’ve compiled a list of things that are making my blood pressure rise… as documented at my Midwife appointment yesterday (feel free to skip around to a header that interests you if you don’t have the time to entertain ALL my ramblings… hmm, as if you needed my permission to do so).

• The Freaking Snow – I don’t know when I stopped loving the snow. There are pics galore of me as a child playing in it. But I think my distaste mostly happened in college when I had to drive long stretches in it, and someone hit me in it (or I hit them… details are a little fuzzy still from my freshman year). Maybe it was driving from SLC to SGU coming home from THXgiving a few years ago… it took 8 hours for that trip. True, Danny helped me appreciate the white stuff when he got me into skiing again, but I mostly enjoy the “idea” of a ski va-cay. (He says I judge a ski resort by it’s Lodge/food. Is that a problem?) Besides, I’m not super fantastic at skiing, and even when I started getting decent last season from that “Zen Ski and Yoga Camp” last year, my progress has been significantly halted this year by the bun in the oven. (Obviously I’d rather not ski than take a risk with Holden). So my neighborhood looks like a winter wonderland after yesterday’s DUMP, and I mostly think it’s frightful… not so much delightful.

• Freaking Technology (mainly that I don’t/won’t have it anymore)…Goodbye Berry – that’s right, I’m turning my CrackBerry back into SkyWest while on this hiatus/break/interregnum (call it what you will… although, I think “interregnum” sounds a little PG-13ish.) I’m swapping out for a cheap mobile phone from days past that I.T. has left over… because let’s face it… I can’t really afford to keep fancy technology around when we’re living on one income. Dreams of an iPhone would take a Christmas miracle… and let’s be honest here people, I’m actually in more of a need for a crib for Holden than a 3G in life…right? (So the only “3G” world I’m living is paying off the $3K’s we spent on Christmas last year! Which brings me to….)

• Living on One Freaking Income – (Enter Expletives Here!) It totally sounded possible in theory. But then I actually looked at what the theory’s “numbers” were, and was thinking… hmm, I’m going to have to give up more than facials and designer handbags. Maybe even Aveda shampoo?!?!? (Well, let’s not do anything drastic, just yet.) Yep, kinda freaking out a little bit. At least gas prices are down… so that’ll help a little. I really need to find some writing jobs again on the side, or something to supplement the household income. Don’t get me wrong, Danny’s got a great set up at Zions… and we’re totally thankful for it, and I’m super proud of him for finding and working a grown-up job… but we’ve been spoiled. Soooo, no more shopping sprees, spa days, and we certainly won’t be eating out 5 times or more a week. I might actually have to cook.

• O.M.G. (gosh, obviously). I am going to have to start cooking again?!?! It’s definitely time to start working a little more on those “deep breathing and relaxation techniques.” I am obviously going to need them for more than childbirth.